Not Here By Choice (Poem)

At this point, I’m not here by choice,

In order to get better, I must reach out, seek help.

Man, I don’t fucking want to,

I don’t want to, the only reason I’m still here,

is because I don’t want to hurt any of you.

I’m not here for me, I’m here for you, but what about my hurt.

I’m not here to live and hope for a better future.


All this is old, inside is nothing but cold.

If I could slip away, believe me, I would.

I’ve been seeking out a way, to disappear.

But every way, on any giving day, requires outside help.

My life is mine and I want my death to be, I wouldn’t want to burden any of you.


I don’t want any of this anymore.

I’m done with writing, I want this,

But hey, you want me around and in your mind,

I have so much to give, and live for,

If that’s so, name my last song.

Don’t fucking tell me, I have so much more to give,

If you don’t actually have a clue, about who I am or what I do and what I’ve been through.  

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