My thoughts on my 2017, the short version, is that its been a head fuck of a year.
I have spoke/written about my love life at tedium, I wont bore you. I was blissfully happy and then when that fell apart, so did I. my live in care package of six years dropped my package, so I had to deal with starting a fresh. Its been exhausting, I want so bad to not have to deal with my problems, I feel stuck, I mean my faith in life is non existent, I’m now looking at employing a fourth care provider in 9 months. Its such a frustrating process, but it’s a necessity for me but I really cant be bothered to be fed shit by care managers who see me as business. They all sound so positive but when it comes to putting their words into action all of a sudden, it’s a different story.
I don’t want to be completely negative with this post, in fact the main reason I’m writing this is to acknowledge and thank the positive influences in my life, to be completely honest, I don’t deserve the love and support shown from friends and family. I’m talking about the likes of Dave, stepping in multiple times this year to help me train new carers and negotiate with care companies, its difficult for me to put into words the gratitude I have for what you have done for me this year, thank you. Amanuel, you’ve seen me at my happiest and I did warn you that, happiness isn’t usual for me, thanks for being patient Your not too bad for a god botherer! Ego in general, I’m so proud to be a part of this criminally insane and criminally undervalued community, I honestly sincerely hope that my lack of physical presence hasn’t cast any doubt about how much I value ego and how much I want to have a positive impact on ego. It deserves so much more credit than it seems to get.
Obviously I don’t have the energy to write about each individual family member but you have to know how much I love you all, Otherwise why would I keep coming back to a shit hole like Ashington. There is one Family member I have to mention that’s Lil Pop himself, Tyler, we’ve had some mental times as of late haven’t we, you really should be dead, but your not and when you do fully recover I hope we can continue to do what we love, questionable humour and terrible sleeping patterns, seriously though I couldn’t have coped without you at times this year. I’m not asking you to come straight back down to Coventry as soon as your discharged, not even in a few months, a big part of me doubts you’ll be back in 2018 and that’s fine, Tyler, like I’ve said before having you down in Coventry has never been about you helping me out, its been about helping each other I hope. Please look after yourself and if you need anything, you know where I am!
My plans for 2018… maybe blog more, I definitely want to be more involved with ego! Also I want to grow some sort of audience for my poetry and music, aside from that I cant really plan anything while my care isn’t settled. That’s it, see you in 2018